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Monday, October 24, 2011

And this is why I'm mostly always late for everything...

Last week Korban had a bacterial infection and pinkeye, so I kept him home from school today just to make sure all was well before sending him back.  He seemed much better, so I thought it might be okay for us to get out and run a couple of errands.  Getting ready to go anywhere with my crew is always a challenge, but I was feeling energetic and the stuff needed to be done, so we started getting ready.  First of all, I decided to put in Korban's eye drops.  That is normally a two-person job and if there were any other adults around that were strong enough and brave enough we would accept their help too.  I had Brad to help me over the weekend, but he was at work, so I was on my own.  I sort of knew what I was up against, because I tried it once without Brad's help over the weekend.  It did not go well.  Even when both of us are working together, we literally have to pretty much sit on Korban and Brad holds his eye open while I squirt the drop in.  Korban vacillates between screaming and laughing during this time.  I think he really does think we are funny, but man is he strong.  So the one time I tried it without Brad, Korban bucked me right off like an angry bull.  I'm pretty strong too, though.  I may have even held on for eight seconds.  Maybe I should try for a career in bull-riding.  I knew that same approach wouldn't work today, so I tried a modified leg-lock.  That worked pretty well.  If things don't pan out for me on the PBR circuit, maybe I could go with the WWE.  Hmmm...

After that drama, I decided to hop in the shower.  Selah tagged along to the bathroom with me.  Our bathroom has a stand-alone shower and a tub in the corner.  As I was getting in the shower, she was climbing into the bathtub.  I told her not to get in the bathtub and get her clothes wet (she's learning how to turn on the water.)  She was already dressed for the day, and I told her that if she got her clothes wet she would be In Trouble.  Because of previous experiences with my children, I have perfected the art of Rapid Showering.  Imagine my surprise when I hopped out of the shower a few minutes later to find her sitting in the tub with the water trickling, naked.  NAKED!  But, hey, her clothes didn't get wet, so she couldn't get in trouble, right?  She found the loophole.  Maybe she will be an attorney one day.  So I hurried and got dressed and then re-dressed Selah.  Korban was still in his pajamas, so I got ready to put his clothes on.  He didn't want to get dressed, so he started fighting me.  (Yes, I mean that literally.  When he doesn't want to do something like that, he slaps our hands away, scratches, pinches, etc.)  While I was wrestling his clothes on, I somehow managed to crack my pinky finger on the edge of the bathroom counter.  Had to waste more time jumping up and down and howling about that, but it's okay now.  I finished dressing Korban and turned back to Selah.  She had climbed up onto the handwashing stool, gotten the toothpaste, and smeared it across her cheeks like warpaint.  That took some scrubbing to get rid of, but at least she smelled minty fresh afterwards!  

After gathering up sippy cups and assorted paraphernalia, it was finally time to head out the door.  I opened the door to the van and noticed there was no car seat for Selah.  My mom had baby-sat her last Thursday while we took Korban to the dr, and we never got the seat back.  Selah hadn't been anywhere since then, and I had not even realized we didn't have it.  Fortunately, my mom lives close by.  I strapped Selah into Korban's booster, which has a five point harness, and tightened the straps to fit her.  Put his extra booster seat (which does NOT have a five point harness, meaning I don't like to use it) into the empty spot and belted Korban into it.  We drove down the road to my mom's house where we then played musical car seats.  I took Korban out, took out the spare booster, installed Selah's car seat, moved her from Korban's good car seat into her seat, and then strapped Korban into his seat after readjusting the straps to fit him again.  Whew!  And then we were off.  And I was exhausted.  So if you have ever wondered why we have trouble being on time for stuff, well, here's why!

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