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Sunday, June 19, 2011

Father's Day 2011

We had a good day today. The church service this morning was very special. It was Selah's baby dedication. She looked so beautiful in her little white gown and it was a blessing to be able to publicly promise to raise her in a Christian home. The pastor anointed her with oil and prayed over us. Our family stood with us also. It was very touching. We considered letting Korban stay seated with someone in the audience since we didn't know how he would handle being up in front of everybody, but we dismissed that notion very quickly. He's one of us, and we are proud of him and I don't ever want him to feel excluded. Our church has been very good to us and even asked if there was anything they could do to accommodate him. All in all he did really well. He did grab at a lady who was presenting us with flowers and a gift Bible for Selah, which I really hated, but other than that all was well. Selah was completely nonplussed by the extra attention and passed out asleep on her dad's shoulder as soon as we got back to our seats. Apparently being dedicated to the Lord can really wear you out!

After that, we went out to eat with our family and some sweet friends, and that was nice. My kids nearly cleaned out the fruit bar. It was funny. They especially enjoyed the watermelon. I wish my daddy could've seen all of that. I miss him so much! He was an excellent father. Very patient and loving. He was also intelligent and humble at the same time. And of course, very funny. I truly do miss him, but I can't complain too much. We had so many good memories while he was here on this Earth; more than a lot of people get in more years than we had together. So I choose to be grateful for that and keep on walking, keep on living, because I know that's what he would want. But it's always in the back of my mind that I wish he were here to enjoy it with us, especially on days like today. This evening we went to the cemetery and put the flowers from Selah's baby dedication on Daddy's grave. I thought that was a fitting way to honor his memory.  Honestly, I don't visit his grave too often.  He's just not there.  But I wanted to go today, so we did.

And then we came home and played outside until the fireflies came out. I hope Brad realizes how much he means to me and the kids, and that we did enough to celebrate him today. He truly is an awesome daddy to our little monkeys and I love him all the more for it. I hear a lot of sad stories about families dealing with autism in which the father can't or won't accept the diagnosis and the whole family suffers because of that. I'm thankful I've never had to deal with that. It's true, the parents of autistic children have a much higher divorce rate than families with healthy children. And given the stress level, I can honestly see why! But I feel like Brad and I are fighting against the autism and not each other, and that has made all the difference. Brad is strong and caring and fun to be with and he has talked me down out of the crazy tree more times than I could count. He's involved with our kids and there for them. Korban calls him " Dawee," because he can't quite say daddy. It's sweet. I think he's the best "Dawee " there is!

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